There is a point in my life where I had to sit and reflect on a situation in my life. I realized I had not acknowledged or released my pain. Acknowledging and Releasing were pivotal points in the process of my healing.
Now have I always thought about things in this way, ABSOULTELY NOT. Especially when I’m going through the situation that has brought me pain. For instance, when I was betrayed by a friend of mine I had known for 10 years, I didn’t acknowledge the pain I acknowledged the anger. After the event passed I was so wrapped up into the thought of someone hurting me after they knew FIRST HAND what I had been through in life. It wasn’t until some months had passed, that I started to acknowledge the pain. I started to acknowledge that the anger and feeling of betrayal came from pain. I started to acknowledge that I really cared about the friendship and that person.
But peace didn’t present itself until I acknowledged what happened and how it made me feel. I have never thought about releasing the pain, because I felt the situation was what it was. But in this time of growth I know I had to, because with releasing my pain came forgiveness, and that is something I didn’t know how to do.
So I found myself asking: How do you forgive someone who says I’m sorry, but keeps hurting you? How do you forgive someone who you feel is taking your friendship for granted. How do you forgive someone who appears as though they just moved on with their life and your stuck holding the baggage?
But despite it all I was able to find peace. Let me tell you how.
1). I had to of course acknowledge the pain. Without acknowledging the pain I could not be released from the issue and the past.
2). I had to release the pain. I did so by finally talking to my old friend and discussing the hurt I felt and how it had affected my life. I also allowed this person to speak his peace.
3). I had to make peace within myself. I did this by acknowledging my trust issues and the empty feeling in my life due to the loss of the friendship. I had to accept that and place within my mind that I had no control over the situation. Once I did this I had peace.
4). I had to pray to my higher power to place forgiveness in my heart, because at the end of the day that person was their for me at times when I needed him the most. I also had to pray that God’s will be done.
5). I had to quit carrying on conversations with the person as if everything was ok or would be ok, because I was only hurting myself. I had to take things as they came, and acknowledged how I felt at that moment and coped through it.
That is how acknowledging and releasing my pain allowed me to move own and continue to have healthier friendships. Now am I still dealing with the thought of the friendship we had? Yes, because I am human and this person was more than a friend, he was like my brother, my family. But life moves on and if a person really appreciates you or loves you they will do everything in their power to make things right. If not, it’s time for you to release yourself from the pain and the situation. You deserve it!